I once...

[Kerouac]

I was once mistaken as a chubby, bearded comedian with a fondness for wolf packs. I signed autographs in his name.

 

[DdBob]

I once put too much pasta in not enough water and boiled it too long.

 

[Kerouac]

I once was gifted a signed DVD of a pornstar's latest film (at the time) where she wrote, "Andy, I'll never forget that thing you did with your thumb." She sent it to me herself.

 

[Rick 381]

I once had a girl or should I say she once had me

 

[Honkridge]

My brother was an astronaut

 

[micwalt]

I've been shoulder deep in a cow.

me too. had to tie a rope around the hooves of the calf to pull it out."

Me too. Mrs. Walt was a dairy veterinarian when we were first married. I assisted once.

 

[DdBob]

I once read a Honkridge post completely naked

 

[Rick 381]

Me too. Mrs. Walt was a dairy veterinarian when we were first married. I assisted once.

I once did that with a draft horse.

 

[Theodore]

My brother was an astronaut

 

[mongooz]

wow......who'd have imagined that the most common non-musical (and unusual) experience of our forumites would be birthing farm animals.

 

[yabba]

I've been shoulder deep in a cow.

me too. had to tie a rope around the hooves of the calf to pull it out. it took 3 of us.

wait.....that's not my "i once...."

Me too. Mrs. Walt was a dairy veterinarian when we were first married. I assisted once.

same. I grew up in wisconsin, where this is just a normal part of childhood. luge lessons. cow fisting. In the spring we'd make meat helmets.

 

[mongooz]

same. I grew up in wisconsin, where this is just a normal part of childhood.

^^^^^^see my post above

 

[Kerouac]

wow......who'd have imagined that the most common non-musical (and unusual) experience of our forumites would be birthing farm animals.

Pretty sure we all spent some time in the Midwest.

 

[mongooz]

Pretty sure we all spent some time in the Midwest.

i'm from Pennsylvania. born in Lancaster County. there are people there who STILL don't have electricity.

 

[Theodore]

My brother was an astronaut

 

[Lerxst]

....knew a man from Nantucket

 

[Theodore]

I can see cows from my window but never stuck my arm up one's ass. #noexcuses

 

[mongooz]

i once (with the help of a friend) got an unconscious hang glider pilot down out of a tree top that he crashed into on the side of a 3000 foot mountain. (shenandoah valley)

 

[mongooz]

I can see cows from my window but never stuck my arm up one's ass. #noexcuses

calves don't come out of their butts.

 

[Coralkong1]

...........whipped my cock out at a gig, after hiding it (exposed) behind my guitar, and let chicks take pictures of it.

...........vomited on stage at a gig due to over-indulging.

...........partied with Billy Idol on his tour bus.

...........got offered to open for the Indigo Girls, but it was last minute, and we couldn't make it.

.........urinated myself while playing guitar on-stage.

.........got head while playing guitar at a gig.

..........got a record deal/lost a record deal in a single day.

.........was so fucked up that I was at Burger King on one side of the highway, and when it was pointed out to me that there was a Burger King on the OTHER side of the highway, I lost my shit and had a bad trip in the middle of the Burger King dining area.

..........helped an elderly lady to her car, so she didn't fall down on the ice. (I just did this the other night, and am putting this in here to make myself look a little better. *ahem*)



Oh, the list goes on, and on, and on, and on.......and those are the clean ones. I'm kind of glad I don't remember most of those stories.