Newsflash! People who stand to pee and don't lift the seat are assholes

yabba said:
Definitely. People who stand to pee in their own homes are dumb, but one's home is one's castle and if one enjoys tiny droplets of pee on one's bathroom floors, that's one's own business. I will rule with an iron fist, but it will be a reasonable iron fist.
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God gave me a weiner so I wouldn't have to sit like a girl when i peed. It was so I could fight dinasaurs, Lions, and such ...basically so I could be out say for instance in a Scottish snow blizzard fighting a bunch of Englishmen and when the time came to pee I would be able to just pull my kilt up and pee and then get back to the killing. whereas mylady would be at home in the castle doing woman things like cleaning and tending to the cook fire...she had time to sit and pee which is why God never gave her a weiner....jus' sayin :embarrassed::wink:cop0:tongue:
 
DdBob said:
God gave me a weiner so I wouldn't have to sit like a girl when i peed. It was so I could fight dinasaurs, Lions, and such ...basically so I could be out say for instance in a Scottish snow blizzard fighting a bunch of Englishmen and when the time came to pee I would be able to just pull my kilt up and pee and then get back to the killing. whereas mylady would be at home in the castle doing woman things like cleaning and tending to the cook fire...she had time to sit and pee which is why God never gave her a weiner....jus' sayin :embarrassed::wink:cop0:tongue:
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I shit standing up. These legs don't spread for nothin'.
 
DdBob said:
God gave me a weiner so I wouldn't have to sit like a girl when i peed. It was so I could fight dinasaurs, Lions, and such ...basically so I could be out say for instance in a Scottish snow blizzard fighting a bunch of Englishmen and when the time came to pee I would be able to just pull my kilt up and pee and then get back to the killing. whereas mylady would be at home in the castle doing woman things like cleaning and tending to the cook fire...she had time to sit and pee which is why God never gave her a weiner....jus' sayin :embarrassed::wink:cop0:tongue:
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LORD OF DICK!
 
Theodore said:
I shit standing up. These legs don't spread for nothin'.
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God gave you that ability so when you were out doing stuff like spearfishing, steering a tugboat, etc ..that you could get the job done with minimal breaks...drop the load and git-r-dun where as your woman had time to sit and crap when she was out shopping in the malls or playing bridge with the other neighborhood women :wink:
 
DdBob said:
God gave you that ability so when you were out doing stuff like spearfishing, steering a tugboat, etc ..that you could get the job done with minimal breaks...drop the load and git-r-dun where as your woman had time to sit and crap when she was out shopping in the malls or playing bridge with the other neighborhood women :wink:
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MANCRAP!
 
DdBob said:
God gave me a weiner so I wouldn't have to sit like a girl when i peed. It was so I could fight dinasaurs, Lions, and such ...basically so I could be out say for instance in a Scottish snow blizzard fighting a bunch of Englishmen and when the time came to pee I would be able to just pull my kilt up and pee and then get back to the killing. whereas mylady would be at home in the castle doing woman things like cleaning and tending to the cook fire...she had time to sit and pee which is why God never gave her a weiner....jus' sayin :embarrassed::wink:cop0:tongue:
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A fun post, yes..but I use to, and thousands of others (now14-39) do now still think like this.
Me? Nowadays the preference is to sit, just more relaxing if you have the time. Standing’s cool, but really, lift that seat with your foot if you stand. If you go in the ladies room, and I know you have, if you stand, lift that bastard, then lower it WITH YOUR SHOE. Unless you are happy as an animal.
 
DdBob said:
God gave me a weiner so I wouldn't have to sit like a girl when i peed. It was so I could fight dinasaurs, Lions, and such ...basically so I could be out say for instance in a Scottish snow blizzard fighting a bunch of Englishmen and when the time came to pee I would be able to just pull my kilt up and pee and then get back to the killing. whereas mylady would be at home in the castle doing woman things like cleaning and tending to the cook fire...she had time to sit and pee which is why God never gave her a weiner....jus' sayin :embarrassed::wink:cop0:tongue:
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of course I pee standing up out in the woods or spearfishing or piloting my tugboat, that's one of the great pleasures of life, and at least a minor recompense for toxic masculinity. I'm a very dedicated and enthusiastic outdoor (standing) pisser, but when I'm back home at the castle I don't want piss all over everything.
 
yabba said:
of course I pee standing up out in the woods or spearfishing or piloting my tugboat, that's one of the great pleasures of life, and at least a minor recompense for toxic masculinity. I'm a very dedicated and enthusiastic outdoor (standing) pisser, but when I'm back home at the castle I don't want piss all over everything.
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Just pee on the dog!
 
yabba said:
of course I pee standing up out in the woods or spearfishing or piloting my tugboat, that's one of the great pleasures of life, and at least a minor recompense for toxic masculinity. I'm a very dedicated and enthusiastic outdoor (standing) pisser, but when I'm back home at the castle I don't want piss all over everything.
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fair enough....that makes me fell better :)
 
I never understood those commercial horseshoe-shaped seats that give you the false impression that you could actually pee standing and part the Red Sea. I have done it, but you can bet that particular style of seat has been pissed on more than most. Definitely a job for the shoe-lift, and pray you never have to sit.
 
Steverino said:
I never understood those commercial horseshoe-shaped seats that give you the false impression that you could actually pee standing and part the Red Sea. I have done it, but you can bet that particular style of seat has been pissed on more than most. Definitely a job for the shoe-lift, and pray you never have to sit.
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Huh! it never occurred to me that that might be why those seats exist... I bet you're right - they probably encourage lack of seat lifting.
 
Sadly most people are assholes anyway. Peeing on the toilet seat in a public restroom just one more reason.

Kick the thing up if it is still clean. Do your business. Leave it up to keep the next A-hole from peeing on it. If it is already pissed on, have at it.

To the bigger asshole who wipes his boogers on the wall over the urinal at my gym, I hope you die of a nasty wasting disease.
 
If you don't want to touch the seat, use some toilet paper.

Sorry but splish splash on the seat ain't cool.
 
Wow...some of you actually sit down? NOT MANLY!!

And, out where I live, all of the men's rooms have, you know, urinals.
 
yabba said:
but when I'm back home at the castle I don't want piss all over everything.
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Not only that, but if you've had a healthy night of wine and ale you either do the tripod with your head against the wall over the urinal, or . . . . just sit down at home. Sitting doesn't stop the spinning, but makes it more manageable.
 
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