it's 3:25 in the morning and my tummy hurts

Mine doesn’t hurt. But last night I wolfed down two sushi rolls, a huge bowl of spicy tonkotsu ramen, two slices of pineapple, and half a pound of fruit. I’ve taken four dumps since I woke up at 4:30.
 
I tend to get stomach aches if I eat too many peanuts or mixed nuts. Peanut M&M’s will do it to me. Strangely enough, drinking a soft drink like Coke or Pepsi fixes it.

I don’t drink soft drinks on a regular basis, but my wife and son drink them, so they’re in my fridge. I used to drink daily soft drinks until I figured out that those were tearing up my stomach. I drink water more than 95% of the time.
 
Man, the night before last I woke up at 2:30 and had to sprint to the bathroom. I won't regale you with the gory details, but it was gnarly!
 
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